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Choosing My Own Thickness.

…I have learned to be CoNtEnT whatever the circumstances.

Philippians 4:11b

Years ago I was introduced to a woman who made her own whole wheat bread for her family. Through a co-op, she purchased large buckets of hard spring white and/or red wheat berries and ground them with a counter top, electric grain mill* into this hearty, nourishing whole wheat flour which she then used to bake bread and muffins, etc. Having been so inspired by the relative ease and health benefits, this former pre-sliced, packaged white fluff eater has made her own whole wheat bread ever since with slight adjustments to the original recipe.** 

Problem was, I didn’t introduce this to my family until the four kids were a tad older. And by then, they’d already developed a mental mindset and taste for the other pre-sliced, refined, bleached, store bought whatever it is. Basically, healthful or not, no one else beneath my roof cared much for it.

“Fine,” I’d respond with nose in the air. “All the more for me.” 🙂 

For different reasons, there’s been a heightened interest in eating less and more “clean” in the Felkins family. As a result, it’s turned a few heads toward Momma’s delicious, slightly sweet, whole wheat loaves. Which is a beautiful thing.


Being the only one who’d ever really eaten it, I’d also chosen to pre-slice the loaves after they cool so the task is over and done and ready when I want a slice.

Enter my husband, who’s taken a liking to the bread, and kindly said, “I like choosing the thickness.”

I hesitated at first.

Ahem, my loaves.

But very quickly realized the simple joy of choosing the thickness I wanted in the moment. Because on some days I really would prefer more. But on other days, it’s best to have less.

Taking a Cutco bread knife (only the best for my baked wonders) to the end of the loaf, pondering how much or little I desired, it hit me…

I do this same thickness choosing thing with God. 

[bctt tweet=”It seems as if I try to take the bread knife from His hand and place it in my own” username=”MaryAFelkins”]In matters of plenty and abundant blessings, I want thicker slices. In matters of difficulty, I want it sliced thin. Super thin. 

But being sovereign, only God chooses the thickness of what I need each day. Being that He’s the bread of life, (Jesus declared, ‘I am the bread of life.’ John 6:35), He asks that I trust Him on thicker sliced days full of hardness or thinner sliced days that have felt like mere crumbs of fleeting joy. 

No matter the thickness, the slice of bread He gives me is always, always good.

“…I have learned to be CoNtEnT whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

Philippians 4:11b-12.

*Here’s at grain mill very similar to mine:

**If any of you want the exact recipe and specifics of making Slightly Sweet Whole Wheat Bread, let me know in comments and I’ll email it 🙂


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